Doodler of My Life

I was driving down the street today and my mind was camping around expectations in this newest season of life~my expectations of myself, the expectations of others of what a "good life and productive life" should be, expectations of society of what is "the thing to do" with your life.  As usual my thoughts were becoming quite conflicted and overwhelming on the topic, feeling pulled this way and that. 

Suddenly, I felt God telling me that all of those "other" expectations were not what I should be considering.  I saw a vision of my grandkids Doodle Pro (new version of the old Etch-a-Sketch).  The Doodler has a bar along the side, when slidden across, erases the content of the board.  I saw scribbles all over the little pink Doodler, representative of  "expectations",  and then the bar slid across, all content gone, the board cleared and it was like God was telling me,

                    Now let's start with My vision for you for this season, the path I have for you". 

Enough said.  One Word from God and peace came and my heart settled.  I don't know the content of His vision for me during this season, but He does and He'll be faithful to draw it out for me in the ways and times that He sees fit.

And Yet Another Change

It's been a long time since I've written anything on this blog.  Actually, the last post I made we were in the process of being transferred with Kerry's job.  We were transferred to the panhandle region of Texas the end of October, 2010 and here we are less than 20  months later and we have been transferred back to where we came from. 

Our season in the panhandle was mixed with trials and blessings.  It would be hard to recap the last 20 plus months in this post but suffice to say, we grew and learned much in those days.  Some lessons were sandpaper while others were oil from Heaven and all were used of God for our growth and blessing and His greater glory. 

I want to thank God for a sweet friend He sent my way during that season.  I know, though we only spent a brief time together in Pampa, this is a friendship bathed in God's love and will last across the miles.  Thank you God and thank you, Leslie. 

We are now back in Midland.  We were moved in last Thursday and spent Friday at the hospital waiting the arrival of our fourth beautiful grandbaby.  Aww, now that's a blessing.   

I'm still trying to unpack and decorate our new home.  I love the new home, but with each move I find I need to be rid of some things in the house to better fit our newest environment.  My sister is having a garage sale and has invited me to join her or maybe I invited myself, either way, I'm loading up the truck and planning to make extra spending money for vacation.  I'm afraid we'll look like the Beverly Hillbillies as we go to her house, but at least things will be lightened around the house.

Life can follow the same needed pattern.  Much like evaluating a new home environment to see what fits and what doesn't, there are times in life to re-evaluate our inner life surroundings as well.  It's probably time to purge my heart of some clutter that's been gathering.  Too bad I can't send it to a garage sale also and make some money off it.  =)  But, I am sure to gain much in the way of peace and joy as I cleanse my heart as well as my home.

CHANGE AND POSSESSING

It's been quite some time since I've blogged anything. I'm going to give this another try.

I never know what I will write about until I sit down at the computer and my fingers touch the keys...so here goes.

Change is in the air. I've known it in my spirit for a year now. I don't know what God has around the corner, but I know it's getting close. In reality life is full of change, sometimes it's small changes that you hardly notice and other times the changes are large and impact your life in immediate and profound ways. I like change for the most part. I am often too easily bored.

Change is in large part an adventure in trusting our God with the details of our lives. Through change and many other things, I've learned and continue to learn to trust God's love for me, His wisdom, His will for my life, His sovereignty. Without a trust that is constantly in the process of being solidified, change would be overpowering. With a growing trust in the aspects of God's character listed above that I cling to, many changes have meant "adventure"-an adventure with God.

There have been and will be some changes in this life, that are painful. Some come through loss, betrayal, and illness. These are not an adventure that has made me "giddy" with anticipation, but they are still an adventure with God of another nature. Through these, God has continued His work in me-refining me, purifying me, maturing me. I do not like them AT ALL in the moment, but when I have come through it and am on the other side, I find peace in what God has been doing in my life through it.

I've been re-reading A. W. Tozer's, The Pursuit of God. In Chapter Two, The Blessedness of Possessing Nothing, he writes about the creation of man, "In the deep heart of man was a shrine where none but God was worthy to come." He continues, "Our woes began when God was forced out of His central shrine and things were allowed to enter [the shrine]. Within the human heart things have taken over. Men have now by nature no peace within their hearts, for God is crowned there no longer, but there in the moral dusk, stubborn aggressive usurpers fight among themselves for first place on the throne."

"This is not a mere metaphor, but an accurate analysis of our real spiritual trouble. There is within the human heart a tough, fibrous root of fallen life whose nature is to possess, always to possess. It covets things with a deep fierce passion. The pronouns my and mine look innocent enough in print but their constant and universal use is significant. They express the real nature of the old Adamic man better than a thousand volumes of theology could do. They are verbal symptoms of our deep disease. The roots of our hearts have grown down into things, and we dare not pull up one rootlet lest we die. Things have become necessary to us, a development never originally intended. God's gifts now take the place of God, and the whole course of nature is upset by the monstrous substitution."

(Please don't stop here thinking this is all about giving away all you have and becoming a monk. It's much bigger and better than that.)

"Breaking this truth into fragments for our better understanding, it would seem that there is within each of us an enemy which we tolerate at our peril. Jesus called it 'life' and 'self', or as we would say, the self-life. It's chief characteristic is its possessiveness; the words gain and profit [Matthew 16:24-25] suggest this. To allow this enemy to live is, in the end, to lose everything. To repudiate it and give up all for Christ's sake is to lose nothing at last, but to preserve everything unto life eternal."

He goes on to reference Matthew 5:3, "Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of God." He says, "The blessed poor are no longer slaves to the tyranny of things. They have broken the yoke of the oppressor; and this they have done not by fighting but by surrendering. Though free from all sense of possessing, they yet possess all things. 'Theirs is the kingdom of heaven.'

Tozer is not saying that to be "spiritual" we will not be blessed with things, he is writing about the tyranny of the need to possess things, the tyranny of allowing anything to become so important to us that it dethrones God and becomes central in our passions, desires, thoughts, and pursuits. Before I continue with that thought, I want to interject that "things" may be just that "things"(house, car, furniture, toys) but it is really anything that becomes so central in our lives that God is NOT. Things may be prestige, relationships, accolades, praise of man, power, position.

The central storyline in this chapter concerns Abraham's heart when God called him to sacrifice Isaac, the promised son. Tozer writes, "God let the suffering old man go through with it up to the point where He knew there would be not retreat, and then forbade him to lay a hand upon the boy. To the wondering patriarch He now says in effect, 'It's all right, Abraham, I never intended that you should actually slay the lad. I only wanted to remove him from the temple of your heart that I might reign unchallenged there. I wanted to correct the perversion that existed in your love. Now you may have the boy, sound and well. Take him and go back to your tent." Abraham's heart was tested, the roots of possession were ripped out, and he was now free to love his son freely with God on the throne.

Tozer continued, "I have said that Abraham possessed nothing. Yet was not this poor man rich? Everything he had owned before was his still to enjoy: sheep, camels, herds and good of every sort. He had also his wife and his friends, and best of all he had his son Isaac safe by his side. He had everything, but he possessed nothing. There is the spiritual secret. There is the sweet theology of the heart which can be learned only in the school of renunciation."

I love this line from chapter two and have found it to be true through many life experiences, "Everything is safe which we commit to Him, and nothing is really safe which is not so committed."

What does all of this have to do with impending change? Sometimes even the adventure of change means letting go of something, someone, some place, in order to go with God. To go with God in peace, He has to dwell on the throne of your heart. In releasing all else to Him, knowing He loves me, knowing His perfect will is always the best, knowing He is sovereign, I know I can follow Him wherever He leads me and He will keep safe all that I've committed to Him.

I will end with a closing word and prayer from chapter two of The Pursuit of God. "If we would indeed know God in growing intimacy, we must go this way of renunciation. And if we are set upon the pursuit of God, He will sooner or later bring us to this test."

"Father, I want to know Thee, but my cowardly heart fears to give up its toys. I cannot part with them without bleeding and I do not try to hid from Thee the terror of the parting. I come trembling, but I do come. Please root from my heart all those things which I have cherished so long and which have become a very part of my living self, so that Thou mayest enter and dwell there without a rival. Then shalt Thou make the place of Thy feet glorious. Then shall my heart have no need of the sun to shine in it, for Thyself wilt be the light of it, and there shall be no night there. In Jesus name, Amen."

Trina's Snippets

Today as I was doing my Bible study, Living the Spirit-Filled Life, by Jack Hayford, we studied a scripture that has meant much to me over the years. Reading it slowly, breaking it down is like looking into the brazen laver as described by Juanita Bynum in The Threshing Floor. It is like looking in a mirror to see where we are and where we are not reflecting Christ in our lives, how He not only lives in us but through us.

Colossians 3:1-17

NIV

¹Since, then, you have been raised with Christ,

set your hearts on things above,

where Christ is seated at the right hand of God.

²Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

³For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.

⁴When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.

⁵Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature:

sexual immorality,

impurity,

lust,

evil desires

and greed, which is idolatry.

⁶Because of these, the wrath of God is coming.

⁷You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived.

⁸But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these:

anger,

rage,

malice,

slander,

and filthy language from your lips.

⁹Do not lie to each other,

since you have taken off your old self with its practices

¹⁰and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.

¹¹Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all.

¹²Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with

compassion,

kindness,

humility,

gentleness

and patience.

¹³Bear with each other

and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another.

Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

¹⁴And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

¹⁵Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace.

And be thankful.

¹⁶Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom,

and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God.

¹⁷And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

*********

*"Snippets"--clips, morsels, fragments from something I've read recently...something that has ministered to me or someone else.

They are meant to encourage, challenge, or cause us to ponder.

They may even cause you to run to the nearest bookstore and pick up a copy of the book they are snipped from.

If you forward "Snippets" to anyone, please send it in its entirety, not deleting the original source or author.

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Snippets birthed May 10, 2003

To Everything Turn, Turn, Turn. There is a Season...

Today as I talked with God about my life, purpose, and what I need to be doing in this season of life, He had a talk with me about not being focused. I tend to be scattered in my objectives at times. I am usually reading several books at once, throw in a few other devotionals, and a couple of magazines. I want to make numerous improvements in my life. I want to cook more new healthy recipes, learn more about photography, take a watercolor class, take more pottery classes, learn to play the guitar, sew more, learn a little Spanish for our trip to Guatemala, get all of the photographs, scrapbooks, and recipes in order. I can't ever neglect my time for prayer and journaling. Add these to my most important priorities and objectives: Time with God, my husband, my kids and grandbabies. Oh and cleaning house occasionally and trying to be more consistent in my workouts. (The list is more extensive, but I don't want you to thing I'm a total mess.)

The result of my shot-gun shell spray kind of life is that I dabble in everything and become proficient at very little. So from time to time God has to sit with me and help me narrow my focus for a season. I don't know why I think I have to do it all at once as if I knew for sure I wouldn't live into the next year.

Most women who've been wives and mothers understand that during our childrens growing up years the time available to spend on ourselves is very limited. We want to meet the needs of our family and enjoy them so it's not something we begrudge at all. During those years most of us served on school committees, Team Mom for many sports activities, and served God in some form of ministry or at least something similiar to these. Then you get to these middle years and the kids are grown, married and having families of their own and you now have time for all of these things you've put off. And in my case, it's essentially the first time since I was eighteen that I haven't had a full-time, stress-fill job to go to on top of it all. So, here I am trying to define myself, my purpose, my dreams. Books tell me that this is my time to do these things; that it's a privilege I've earned.

Because I can shoot in so many directions, I have to start every morning by asking God what He has on my agenda for the day, where am I to focus. There will be other seasons to accomplish some of the things on my lists. I don't know if any of you are in this place in life, but after the talk God and I had this afternoon and the direction He gave me, I am expecting tomorrow to be a more productive day even with keeping grandbabies the next two days. (And that makes it not only productive but fun, a little more joy added to the day.)

Thank You God for blessing me with my family then and now. Thank You for allowing me the years to spend with my husband and my boys. These precious memories are irreplaceable. Thank You for this new season with more time for my husband and I to share and make many new memories. The empty nest has been a lot of fun for us. Thank You for grown sons, their wives, and the most precious grandbabies ever and the blessing of watching them make their own lives together and growing in their walks with You. Most of all thank You for loving me. I love You too. (Thank you Beth Moore for sharing the Word on "I love You too.")

http://www.lifetoday.tv/qt/2010/01/100120.htm

Dear blogging world,

I've been away from you for awhile. I haven't checked in much and haven't written much, but I'm back. I plan to start checking in on your wonderful blogs again and will hopefully have something to write myself.

But for today, I just wanted to say I've missed being apart of the blog world and am looking forward to reading what's been on your heart to write about and what God's been doing in your lives.

"See" you again soon.

Trina

Glory to God

It's been quite some time since I've sat down to write on this blog. It's not that there hasn't been plenty to blog about. There has been too much going on. Most has been of a private nature and I don't feel free to go into details, BUT I do want to share that God has been doing great things. Of course, that's His nature~doing great things. He does great things in the small things and great things in the bigger things, and great things in the huge things. We've been experiencing a little of all of it.

Regardless of the circumstances, it is always amazing to stand back a moment and realize all He's been doing not only in the circumstances, but in the people involved, and in myself. I don't believe that God causes all the bad things in our lives, or that they are His ultimate will, but I do believe God will use whatever we're experiencing, wherever we've failed, whatever has been done to us, whatever is painful for our ultimate good and for His glory. There are choices involved though. We must choose to submit to Him, yield to the working of the Holy Spirit and actively choose to allow Him to work all things out for good to those who love Him and are called according to His purposes. (Romans 8:28) Most of that involves nailing "self" to the cross and choosing to let Him be Lord over us and Lord over ALL. "Self" has a tendency to get in the way of God. One or the other is on the throne and as long as self is on the throne, life will be chaotic. The throne is not a two-seater. It's not a throne built for two. Just One!

During this season God has been teaching me so much about Believing Him and trusting Him no matter what the physical realm circumstances may be screaming around me. He is always at work and there is much activity going on in the spiritual realm that we are not as aware of. Oh, we may get glimpses, but I've never seen with my eyes, even my spiritual eyes, all that is taking place. His Word tells us that faith is the substance of things hoped for, things yet unseen. (Hebrew 11:1) I have been on a journey to have faith in what God has spoken to me and faith in the God who spoke them, regardless of circumstances. This is an area I've grown in over the years, but God and I are going to an all new and deeper level than ever before. The faith journey can be at times wearisome, but the faith journey is exciting!

I've been praying for God to move some mountains. Last week I prayed for Him to shake the ground. The night I prayed this, one of the situations I was praying over came to a new level of conflict. I cried out to God and ask Him what was going on? He spoke to me in my spirit saying that He was indeed shaking the ground, that things hidden where coming to the surface as preparation and as a part of moving the mountains. My tears dried up immediately and I praised my God for shaking the ground and the movement that was taking place to move the mountains.

I hope I haven't rambled and confused anyone, but there really has been so much going on. The details may be personal, but His workings and manifestations are to be proclaimed from the rooftops. Glory to God in the Highest!!!